'Cause I was distinctly of the recollection that I had been sent a photo of a passel of leafy greens. Then I receive the clarification. My niece, a native Spanish speaker, while speaking English just as good as any intelligible native speaker (and twice as good as any American), decided to Google translate one of the few words she did not know in English: "cilantro." Which just so happens to be derived from Spanish and is exactly the same when you put it in English and only ever becomes "coriander" when you run it through an online translator. Well now, ain't that a hearty head of lettuce to the haunches? So, she didn't need coriander after all, and hence, I pinched off a bundle of cilantro. However, not before, and merely as a memento to never forget the moment, I select a modest gift to present to my niece. A simple, small spice jar reading, "grounded coriander," so she may never live this moment down (a little steep, but worth the $6 I paid, if you ask me).

Now, is that the end? Well, s'pose so, not unless I wanna name my next kid "Coriander" ("Coriandra" if it's a girl). Got a kinda cute ring to it, though. Nicer than Chlamydia (Clapper if it's a boy). Anyway, y'all are probably wonderin', "How in the GRANNYDOESYOURDOGBITENOCHILDNO does this relate to folklore?!" Very simple, I spent the past few pages tellin' y'all about essentially nothing. The lesson? That it is not always what happens in a story that is important but how you tell it. Now, please don't ya'll go and hack my Hulu account, I only got twenty days left. Lenwood S. Sharpe, Director Lumberwoods, Unnatural History Museum Parts Unknown, The Woods, U.S.A.